Dear Parent,
If your child is adopted, his/her brain is not the same as a healthy, attached, birth child. When we ascribe negative intention to our children's behavior, we are sadly mistaken. Our children have special needs. They need special consideration regarding every day activities.
For example:
When they take forever to get dressed...
When they will not accept your clothing choices...
When screaming is their response to "no"…
When they are charming when others say "no"…
When they are withdrawn and negative...
When they are outspoken and attention seeking...
When they are good at getting their way...
When they seem helpless and inadequate at every turn...
When they are controlling...
When they don't take responsibility...
When they are irrational...
When they are black and white...
When they are clumsy...
When they insist on doing things their own way...
When they are clueless about the needs of others...
When they are self-centered...
When they hoard...
When they break everything they touch...
When they do not share...
When they share everything...
When they buy friendship…
When they would go home with anyone...
When they will not let go of your hand, ever...
When they seem perpetually two-years-old...
When they act twenty-seven-years-old...
…they need our understanding, compassion, and patience for their brain related specialness. Give your child compassion in the form of patience and understanding. You will need to have respite time to be able to do that. Get it! You deserve it.
If your child has special needs, you do, too.
Love matters,
Ce
P.S. Check out the Love Matters Parenting Society membership for more support.
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