When Was the Last Time You Delighted in Your Child—as a Child?
Aug 07, 2025
Dear Parent,
Be honest.
When was the last time you really played with your child—not as the responsible adult overseeing the fun, but as a co-conspirator in joy?
I’m not talking about sitting nearby while they play and tossing in a “good job” or a half-hearted roar during dinosaur time.
I’m talking about slipping into your child ego state—the part of you that knows how to belly laugh, chase wildly, roll on the carpet, get breathless with silliness, and lock eyes with your child in a moment of shared wonder or full-bodied fun.
That kind of play—messy, loud, free—creates more than giggles. It forges delight. Mutual delight. Safety. It says, “You’re not alone—I’m with you, all in.” And that kind of attuned connection dissolves the need for attention-seeking behavior, because your child already has what they crave most: you.
But if that kind of play feels awkward or hard, you're not alone.
Many of us weren’t given that kind of freedom as children. I sure wasn’t. Maybe trauma stole it. Maybe we were the ones doing the caretaking, managing adult emotions, growing up too fast. Delight was a luxury we couldn’t afford.
So it makes sense if play feels foreign now.
Here’s the invitation:
Start small. One moment of unfiltered laughter. One spontaneous pillow fight. One run across the yard where you're not the referee—you’re the teammate.
And let me ask again, lovingly. No shame, no blame:
When was the last time you delighted in your interaction with your child, as a child?
If it's been a while, I'm challenging you. Maybe today’s the day to delight, as a child.
[*Word of wisdom: Remember that big fun can come with dysregulation, so be mindful when enough is enough, even if your child has a hard time stopping. Your child needs to learn how to play joyfully, too.]
Love Matters,
Ce
Creator of the Love+ Parenting Model found only in the Love Matters Parenting Society Therapeutic Parent Program.
Want to overcome your child's destructive behavior? Follow this link to find out how you can join the Love Matters Parenting Society today: http://start.lovemattersparenting.com/guide
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