Salute To Misery

Dear Parent,

Many of you know the after-effects of child abuse, neglect and abandonment.  You are living with them.

What I want to do is give you hope.  Even when the events seem unbearable, it turns out we humans are made for love. And love in this context has nothing to do with that romanticized version of cupids and cartoon birdies singing with little red hearts ballooning out of their chests.  This kind of love is about determination, tenacity, will power, duty, knowledge, follow through, compassion, sacrifice and a mission to change the trajectory of a child with a wounded heart.

Don't get me wrong. It did start out with a dream of cupids and birdies for me. Images of shiny-eyed children and laughing parents frolicking were in my mind while I was bringing my children home for the first time. 

That's where the grief comes in.  When it subsides (and grief does if you let it), the work ethic of love sets in and carries you to the finish line (which, of course, doesn't exist.)  And that is the wonderful part: A new version of dreamy cupids and singing birdies show back up when the healing occurs. 

I repeat.  We are made for love. I love my kids and they finally can love me back. 
Eureka! That means they will be able to love others in their lives. Anything after that is what they make for themselves.

Love matters,

Ce

P.S. Check out the Love Matters Parenting Society membership for more support.