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Fine Tuning The Parenting Dance (Part 2 of 2)

Nov 07, 2022

Dear Parent,

Informed help on healthy correction is hard to find.  I appreciate your looking to me to help you with your challenging parenting situations. 

That said, I want to be clear here.  Nothing works in terms of correction without an overarching plan with multiple facets.  

Plans are specific to families.  Each parent has strengths and weaknesses that contribute to a child or teen's behavior. Each child and teen has strengths and weaknesses that contribute to the effectiveness of any plan. Each child and teen has unique, complex trauma and/or attachment history. Each family has its own dynamics. And every family has its own story, which has already set the groundwork for the future.  

No one thing will work to gain obedience or compliance. Nothing works outside the context of the Big Picture.

The Big Picture is a steady family diet of playful engagement, balanced nurture and structure, shared power, emotional regulation of parent and child, an appropriately attached parenting style, trauma and attachment treatment, leveled correction, and an abundance of respect for your child’s autonomy and felt sense of safety.  If daily you are doing things that contribute to all these Big Picture concepts, then maybe what I offer here will work for you and your attachment challenged child or teen. 

It may help you gain enough credibility in your parent/child relationship to influence some of your child/teen's choices--not all, but some.

What is your Big Picture grade--A, B, C, D, F? If you are C or below, you have work to do before correction ideas of any kind will be helpful to you.

Get going.

Love matters,

Ce

 

P.S. Check out the Love Matters Parenting Society membership for more support.

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