Fear: Fear Begets Fear (Part 1 of 4)

Dear Parent,

I have been genuinely concerned about the future of my children since they were 2 and 3 years old. What parent isn't?  When I realized they had so many divergent emotional needs plus piled high mental health diagnoses, learning disabilities, and pervasive developmental delays, I have been kept awake nights with worry.  

By hard work and Universal grace, I have successfully dealt with my fear.  If not, I might have locked myself in a dark closet with my blankie, sucking my thumb for 15 years.

Now that my children are older, I have had to help them become adults.  All along, like most parents, I prepared them to do utilitarian things. These are ultimately independent living skills.  Both of my kids can make beds, take their own meds, be polite in public and in private, take public transportation, wash their own clothes, and clean all aspects of a house and yard to their individual abilities.  My kids were skilled in the art of living with mom, though not necessarily without me in the big world.  

Their actual abilities were in question. Despite all of the training we give, our specially wired children may not always be independent in adulthood.

To that end, you need to be preparing, too.  Wherever you live, there are organizations in the system that can help.  The help is neither absolute nor completely embracing, but help is help.  Start now learning what is out there to support your child into adulthood. If your child is 5, 15, 18 or older, educate yourself so you can quell your own fear and be more prepared to launch them when the time comes.

Love matters,

Ce

P.S. Check out the Love Matters Parenting Society membership for more support.