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This Is What Survival Looks Like- Flight (Part 2 of 3)

Apr 03, 2023

Dear Parent,

Attachment panic can occur when an attachment challenged person is triggered by perceived deprivation or withdrawal of love. The cellular memory of early deprivation and loss causes a reaction of fight, flight or freeze.

This is flight:

  • When your 8-year-old says nonsensical, random things as you are trying to make connection before you leave for work
  • When your 4-year-old takes off running, forcing you to chase her to get her teeth brushed
  • When your 16-year-old retreats to his room before you get two sentences out about the chores not being done
  • When your 12-year-old pretends memory loss as you confront her on the family computer that shows visits to unsavory websites

When these kinds of mind-boggling events occur, you are witnessing attachment panic flight in your child. 

Try to step out of the trap of making sense of flight behaviors. They don't make sense in the context of the moment. However, in the context of your child's inner world fleeing from fear of deprivation or losing your love makes perfect sense.  

Survival instincts are hardwired.  That means auto pilot running as if being chased by a tiger.

Love matters,

Ce

 

P.S. Check out the Love Matters Parenting Society membership for more support.

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