Feedback Loopy

Dear Parent,

We have more control over our lives than we sometimes think we do.  I read an intricate Wu Li Master kind of article on feedback loops and I realized that I bump into people with both positive feedback loops and negative feedback loops all the time.  I just didn't put two and two together.  

I am often trying to help parents who feel hopeless and overwhelmed about the situation they find themselves in with their attachment challenged children. Hopelessness prevails because of the constant negative feedback loop they are caught in with their children.  Sometimes I get snared by the negative feedback loop, too, and cannot be helpful at all.  Hopelessness plus hopelessness equals despair. 

If this seems like you, too, sometimes, I am challenging you to stage a hope-filled day. Curate the day you are going to have instead of living in the notion that life just happens to you. Here is the Wu Li Master stuff:  

1. Decide to have a hope-filled day. If you thought, Oh sure, you are nuts or some other negative thing...you are in a negative feedback loop.  If this idea intrigues you, then you just stepped into a positive feedback loop.  

2. Now start looking for things that are hopeful in, around, and outside of you. If your 8-year-old son just yelled and threatened to punch you and you felt hopeless like always, you are in a negative feedback loop.  Right now choose to see your child as a ball of creative energy, harmed by the world, who has the organic material built-in to become healed and healthy.  Then smile, and give a hug.  Don't think twice about whether you got one back or not and you are in a positive feedback loop.

3. Plan to feel hope-filled by the end of the day.  Tired and hope-filled can co-exist.  Where do you find solace, joy, hope?  Go get it, seek it, do it, think about it, enjoy it.  If you have started to think this is BS, then you are in a negative feedback loop. If you are starting to get the picture and a little shy excitement is growing inside you, then you are in a positive feedback loop.

4. Cultivate relationships with more positive feedback loop connections.  That is the great thing about positive feedback loops--they are contagious and feed off other positive feedback loops. 

5. Feedback loops create more feedback loops.  You can have negative feedback loops connecting with other negative feedback loops or the opposite. Today, choose to cultivate hope-filled positive feedback loops for yourself.  I dare you.

This is my intention: I plan to be a positive feedback loop connection for all whom I bump into today.

Love matters,

Ce

P.S. Check out the Love Matters Parenting Society membership for more support.